A timid person is frightened before a danger, a coward during the time, and a courageous person afterward.

Jean Paul Richter (1763 -1825)

 You might look at this statement and wonder which of the three possible character qualities you have. You might think out several examples of times were you’ve had  to face your fears to pin point real life examples of who you might be. Or like me, you might just automatically say, “I’m courageous,” thinking you are a brave person with a good conscious. And also like me….you could be wrong.

Last night I went out to dinner with some friends. And the plan was to go for a 10-Mile-Midnight-Jog around the bay. Admittedly, after a lamb souvlaki platter, the idea of midnight running brought to mind this image:

 But I’m athletic and always up for something fun. It didn’t take long though, before others in my party began seeing the same outcome and the idea was nixed.

So around midnight, we were leaving my friend’s house. And seeing that parking in apartment complexes around here is not always easy, we had to walk across a parking lot to get to my car. Suddenly, from down a dark corridor off to my right, comes a white and black dog running full speed at us – barking, gnarling, bearing it’s teeth, foaming at the mouth. I screamed. And as it got closer and showed no sign of stopping, I was sure we were going to get attacked. And get rabbis. And die. A horrible death.

Really, I am not being sarcastic when I post this photo. It was the end. My friend and I were GONERS.  So I scream, and seeing that we were with strapping men, I stand behind my one friend.

But let me preface this next part by saying just one thing: I was bitten in the face by a dog when I was 2 years old. Part of my eyelid was bitten off. In college, I had two surgeries to try to make my eyelid look a bit more “normal,” and even though the evidence of the accident was minor, I still don’t have eyelashes on most of right eyelid. (Believe me, this is important).

So, as I am realizing that the dog is not slowing, I stand behind my friend. And even though he is 5′2 like me, he is a burly climber, and a beast of a man. But as I am screaming, and hiding behind my friend, in my sheer panic, I begin shoving him toward the angry dog and screaming, “Take him, take him he has more meat!!”

Needless to say, the dog did not attack us. In fact, it stopped two feet from us and just kept barking. And then it’s owner came out, screamed at the dog and pulled it back into her house.

Which then left me and my friend standing in the darkness, and I was laughing and sobbing uncontrollably in sheer terror. “Are you ok?” my friend says.  More laughing and crying. And as the panic of the moment quickly wears off, my friend turns to me and says, “Really?? REALLY? Take him he has more meat on him!? Good to know that when it really come down to it, you would sacrifice me to a dog.”

I’m still embarrassingly laughing about it even now. I mean, I would love to look in the mirror every morning believing that I am a bold, courageous person who looks to put others first in a crisis situation. But clearly, I have a proven track record of being a coward.

Words to the wise…maybe I’m not your best rock climbing belay on a multipitched climb. Maybe I just shouldn’t be trusted in any situation where our lives are at stake. Because although I may love you, chances are pretty good that I can get you killed.

And even though you might be pretty sure that you are the hero that saves people and feels fear later, you know you’re a coward if … you find yourself throwing your friends at rabid dogs.